“Work is hard, distractions are plentiful, and time is short”, wrote Author Adam Hochschild.
In today’s world, there is so much pulling us in every direction, making it hard to focus. Other obligations, entertainment, and interruptions of all kinds can grab our attention away from our intended task. With too many things to think about, it can be easy to lose track of what you’re really trying to accomplish.
“Be yourself,” they say, “Everyone else is already taken.” That’s good advice. Just be authentically you.
But if you’re like most people, you may have a few different versions of “you.” There’s the “you” at home when you can relax and not worry about your image. There’s the “you” at work, the “you” when you’re out with friends, and probably the “you” around the people you call family. So which one is the authentic “you”?
As we grow up, we develop all kinds of adaptive behaviors that help us navigate life situations. We learn to recognize ourselves in the reflections of the people around us and that works when we’re learning who we are.
“I respect you.”
As compliments go, that statement is incredibly affirming. The Oxford Dictionary defines respect as “a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements.”
Respect is garnered over time, but that doesn’t necessarily mean you need to have a deep relationship with someone to have respect. Respect is unique because it can be felt from afar without much, if any emotional connection. Your abilities, qualities, or achievements can all speak for themselves – how you are perceived is born out of those elements.
We’ve all been there. Something has embedded itself into our brains and we can’t stop thinking about it. Ruminating, or overthinking, is a common behavior that most people can relate to on some level.
Whether it’s something someone said, something you did, rehashing the past, or worrying about the future, it’s monopolizing your thoughts, and it can become a real problem. At the very least, it can be annoying, undermine your confidence, and prevent you from taking action.
You’ve likely heard the phrase “time is relative” before. As each year passes and you grow older, it becomes shockingly more true. It’s strange, if you watch a clock ticking, you’ll note that – obviously – time is always the same. A second is a second, a minute is 60 of those. Yet it’s the way you perceive time that makes it relative. Some months fly by, while others are akin to walking through thick custard. There’s no way of pinning it down or understanding it at all, really. Time passes through us.
It can often feel as if there is nothing stopping time. The scary thing is there isn’t – it will always plough ahead, leaving everything and everyone in its wake. In amongst this sense of existential dread, there lies you, searching for an ounce of control over this celestial force. We, as humans, tried to understand time by creating clocks and calendars. Our understanding comes from the barriers we have made, the same barriers you can use to improve your time management and put the seconds back in your hands.
As you get older, you get more tired. It’s just the way life goes. But do not mistake that for laziness. The more responsibility you take on, the more energy you use. Without checking yourself, you could burn out.
Given that the average person spends a significant portion of their time at work, prolonged periods of stress are likely to stem from the workplace. However, these stress periods are caused by an emotional, physical, and mental state of exhaustion. That can stem from all walks of life. In this context, the stress-related consequences of exhaustion separate burnout from laziness. While feelings of lethargy and unwillingness to do things may be the consequence of mental health difficulties, it’s important to make the distinguishment between the two, Typically, laziness can be resolved with some relatively small actions. Burnout requires a lot more work.
Focus, or concentration, is the ability to give your full attention to something. It sounds simple, but anyone living in the 21st Century is likely to tell you that it’s not always that easy.
Distractions come from all directions. Whether it’s in the form of technology, social diversions, or any other type of inside or outside disturbance. The ability to stay focused can be easily deterred. And once your concentration is broken, it can take a while to get back on track.
Imagine this scenario. You’ve just moved house, and for the first time, you’re doing a weekly shop. The route is almost the same – you haven’t moved far in this scenario – but with slight differences. You buy your food and head home. As you drive home, you realise you’re not driving home, you’re driving to your old place. The route shares some similarities. You feel a little silly. Chances are you say to yourself:
Force of habit.
That age-old saying has, well, become a habit for most people. Your brain and body will latch on to routine systems, experiences, and processes in the form of habits, whether you like it or not. Your brain craves routine, so when you provide it with repeated actions, you’ll find yourself latching on – even if you know it might be bad for you.
Have you ever wondered why some people seem to reach exceptional levels of success, even if they seem average in other ways?
Not everyone is born with an innate talent for something, but that doesn’t mean they can’t cultivate skills that can take them to their highest level of achievement.
“You need to stop getting in your own way.”
How many times have you heard that before? More to the point, how many times have you heard that before and truly understood what it means?
It’s a simple, well-used slice of advice yet its true meaning can feel quite alien. It makes sense, sure, but to embrace its sentiment, you must first dig deeper. Let’s use a real-life, common example.
